Connecting with Crystals

woman holding six polished stones
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on

I came across a question of interest on facebook.  Someone posted upset that she didn’t feel connected with any of her crystals, and she asked what she could do to feel connected with them.  The popular solutions are to meditate with them more or keep them on your person.  Such advice does have a possibility of solving the dilemma.  You could also sleep with the crystals under your pillow in your pillow case if they are little tumbles.  However, I think sometimes the issue might really be the way in which one expects to experience a connection with crystals.  Reading forums and watching YouTube videos could lead one to have high expectations.  For example, Moldavite (technically a tektite and not a crystal) is typically described as a super high vibrational crystal that has obvious WOW ways of making its energy known.  Some people say they notice a sudden rush of chaos in their life after getting Moldavite.  Some says it leaves them with their head in the clouds, having difficultly focusing on their surroundings.  Some say they feel heat or tingles from it.  However, I read today about a person who was disappointed because he or she felt nothing from the renowndly powerful crystal.

My advice is to avoid strongly basing your expectations on the experiences of others.  Not everyone has the same energy.  Not every crystal of a particular type feels the same in an intuitive manner.  I can dive into a bin of tumbled amethyst and only find one that I feel is for me.  It might not be the “prettiest” or biggest crystal in the bin either.  It just feels like it is supposed to be with me, similar to the feeling when a gal sees a blouse that was “made for her.”   That is how the connection works for me personally.  Thus simply seeing that a crystal type I want is affordable is not enough reason for me to buy it.  I have to feel like that particular specimen is one that is going to be on my mind until I get it.  That is something I suggest keeping in mind when buying crystals, however I restate that people may connect with crystals differently.   Another way I subtly connect with crystals is through intuition telling me what crystal I should pick up/wear on any given day.  One day I had a migraine kicking in and the thought popped into my head to grab my lepidolite which is generally one that just sits out looking pretty.  It seemed to help me relax as my medicine kicked in.  Intuition may also nudge me which crystal jewelry piece to wear each day (if any jewelry).  It’s okay if you don’t feel tingles in your hand when you pick up a stone or suddenly have your third eye blasted open.  There is nothing wrong with feeling a connection to crystals in a subtle way.

Something else to keep in mind is that we might be neutral with some crystals.  We might even feel repulsed by some crystals.  You probably don’t expect yourself to get along with every attractive person you see.  Sometimes there is a spark and sometimes there isn’t.  I don’t think you can force a connection where there is not one.  The same applies to crystals (for those who believe that crystals have energetic properties).  What do you do with your crystals that you don’t connect with?  There are a few options.  You can keep them simply as a part of a rock collection and maybe one day you will feel better matched with some of them.  You can give them away to people who they seem to be suited for, or you can sell them and put that money into a fund for crystals that you do connect with.

I hope somebody finds this helpful.  Blessed be, y’all.



Halloween/Samhain Plans

I will be spending Halloween night watching the live Ghost Adventures special with my grandmother.  The fact they say they are going to open the dybbuk box seems like one of the worst ideas a person could ever have.  I decided to watch it before I found that out thinking it was just be like a 4 hour investigation of Zach’s creepy museum.   Hopefully the people watching do not get bad mojo for viewing it.  I might be wearing some sort of protective pendant to ward of negative energy just in case.  I might even momentarily change the channel.

That being said, those are my Halloween plans.  I will have to celebrate Samhain at the beginning of the day (bringing in the 31st).  Light a candle before bed to honor my loved ones who have crossed over and ask for them to provide protection from any unpleasant spirits that might be around looking to cause mischief.  Last year I had unpleasant spirit/astral themed dreams in the week leading up to Samhain, presumably before of the thinning of the veil.  I don’t recall this ever being a problem before then.  Although I don’t intend to worry about it this year, I will probably set up spiritual protections in my sleeping areas just to be on the safe side.

I hope you all are doing well and have a lovely Halloween/Samhain.

Blessed be, y’all!

Soul Relationships

Thanks to Boys Over Flowers I have been inspired to write a blog after quite a while.  A question was posed in the series (which I won’t come right out and say because I don’t want to toss out a spoiler), that got me thinking about soul relationships.  I have most likely written a similar post in the past, but perhaps my thoughts on the meanings have changed.  Perhaps I have some new insight on the topic.  Here goes.

Soulmate and twin soul (aka twin flame) are terms that tend to be used interchangeably.  Different people have have different understandings of what those terms mean.  My current perception is that a soulmate is a person whom you are meant to go through life with that balances you.  This person is paired with you because you help each other grow.  You challenge and support each other.  You make sense together.  If you are salt, your soulmate is pepper.  You may not always understand each other, but such is what forces you to see things from another’s view.  You likely test each other’s patience because of this.

A twin soul is as literal as it sounds.  Twin souls come from the same soul embryo.  They were created together and share the ultimate twin bond.  Your twin soul is someone you can’t hide your feelings from no matter how skilled you are at masking your emotions.  They will “hear the emergency bell in your heart”, to quote a line from the aforementioned show.  Your soul will feel like it recognizes this person from the moment you meet.  You will understand each other to the point that words are often not needed.  This person will feel like the harbor you dock into when storms are raging.  A soulmate can be your harbor too, but the twin soul is a harbor even when the soulmate is a part of the storm.   My belief is that neither a soulmate or a twin soul is necessarily a romantic partner.  Both terms conjure up the notion that this is someone you should wed.  This may actually be the case many times, but a soulmate or twin soul could instead be a close friend or family member.

Another soul connection is that termed as “kindred spirits”.  I feel like this term is misleading in it’s use because these people are not necessarily part of one’s soul family.  So for the sake of this post, I am going to change the terminology to “alike spirits”.  These are the people you fit in with.  They are people who share your passions and principles.  These tend to be the people you form cliques with.

Soul family is used to describe people who have a tendency to reincarnate in each other’s lives.  You will likely feel an instant sense of familiarity with them.  An example of this would be a sister who has always felt like a mother to you, and you believe she was probably your mother in a past life.  Another example would be befriending a guy who quickly seems just like a brother to you so you suspect he was your brother in a past life.  These souls may not all be together in every lifetime, but the bond remains.

I’d like to add that I suspect one person can have more than one type of soul relationship with you.  A twin soul could become a soulmate.  A soul family member could easily be an alike spirit.  A twin soul is very likely to be an alike spirit.

I think this sums up my thoughts on the topic pretty well.

Blessed be, y’all.


Accidental “Projection”

This morning I had what I will call an accidental astral projection experience.  That being said, I find it perfectly likely that astral projection is a form of lucid dream.  That doesn’t mean it can’t be a spiritual experience.  This experience was not particularly spiritual though.  Just random.

I can tell it happened because of my sleep circumstances.  Much like in a type of lucid dream induction method, my sleep was interrupted for a while.  I was up after a few hours of sleep due to allergies.  I went to the couch to watch YouTube for a while (on autoplay) and eventually fell back asleep around 4 hours after waking up.  While I was sleeping a loud interuptive sound started playing repeatedly as part of the music in a video.  It was very annoying and ‘woke’ me up.  I reached for the remote and tried turning the volume down with my eyes closed, but the volume button didn’t seem to be getting the job done.  I think I may have realized I was not really holding the remote and started grabbing for it again with the same results.  I seem to realize that I might be projecting but wasn’t sure.  I stumbled to the tv with my “eyes” mostly closed and felt for the off button on the tv.  I believe I found it and pushed it yet the sound continued.  I felt upward on the tv (an older model, box-like big screen tv) and I felt the glass.  I was amazed somewhat at how real it felt since I really realized at that point that I was not really touching the tv.  I woke up for real not long after.  I turned the volume down and went back to sleep.  Hours later after waking up for the day I realized that the tv I felt was the tv that was used until a couple of months ago.  It has been replaced with a smaller flat screen tv.  Some might suspect the old tv is still where it was in the astral.  Then again, maybe in my sleepy state I just believed the old tv was still there and that is why I felt that tv.  I lean toward the second.  I believe I tried to walk though the tv, but that was a no-go.

That’s all for this share.  Blessed be, y’all.

Checking in

Hello, lovely readers. I know it’s been a while since I have posted. Lately I’ve been in a bit of a slow phase in terms of spiritual development. I have not had a particularly noticeable wisdom gain over the past few months. My psychic development went rather hush which was frustrating. I am not saying that the psychic development is back full speed ahead, but I do at least seem to have let go of some of the frustration. I hope you have all been doing well. Blessed be.

The Vampire Feedbag

man in blue and brown plaid dress shirt touching his hair
Photo by Nathan Cowley on

This post is going to be about energy vampires (or emotional vampires).  Last night somebody vented to me about emotional tyranny that was going on in their household.  Today I came across some videos explaining a bit about energy vampires and how to deal with them.  This all got me thinking about the topic, and now I feel inspired to share.

What is an energy/emotional vampire?

This is a person who feeds on the energy and emotions of others.  This behavior could be intentional or unintentional.  Many times an energy vampire may not even realize what he or she is doing.  Typically this behavior has harmful effects on those around the person “feeding”, but it can also negatively effect the person feeding.

What are signs of an energy vampire?

Signs of an energy vampire can include:

  • Narcissism
  • Egocentric attitude
  • Regular (as in often occurring) passive aggressiveness
  • Consistent anger
  • A love of arguing and desire to get in people’s faces
  • Drama creation
  • Insecurity (which can come through as jealousy or envy)
  • People in their lives tend to “walk on eggshells” to avoid setting them off.
  • Complains far more than the average person.
  • May have a victim mentality even if he or she is victimizing others
  • Consistently leaves others feeling drained or overextended
  • Likely to take advantage of unaware empaths

What causes somebody become an energy vampire?

I am by no means an expert on the subject, but one reason for this was explained to me as the victim becoming the victimizer.  A person can be warped by their frustration and exhaustion that is caused by dealing with an energy vampire.  This in turn can cause somebody to become an energy vampire.  This could be as dramatic as a person snapping at others because they were snapped at, or as subtle as a person extensively complaining to others about the drama they endure so that the effects of personal drama are passed to others.  (Side note:  I am not saying that one should never vent.  Sometimes people need to unload all the bullshit that has been weighing on them.  However, one must try to avoid unloading too much on others.  We need to be aware of others so that we do not unload our stress onto someone who can’t handle it.  Don’t break another’s back with a straw that was weighing you down.)

I can think of a couple other reasons I suspect people become energy vampires.  Those reasons are to fill a void and to feel important.   If a person feels something is missing from themselves, they might start looking for the missing piece in other people.  A man might say “I don’t know how to be happy” and then seek to correct that by relying on others to make him happy.  A person who feels unimportant might take to attention-grabbing antics in order to feel important.  If a woman constantly creates situations that place her in the middle of drama, there is a good chance that she feels this validates her importance.  “The focus is on me because I matter.”

It likely boils down to a person becoming an energy vampire because of a failure to address harmful mental”wiring” and properly tend to emotional wounds.

What are the effects of energy/emotional vampirism?  

The most recognized effect is the exhaustion of those being drained.  This could be emotional and physical exhaustion.  Some people might try to tip-toe around the vamp so much that their efforts to avoid being drained by emotional flare-ups can be exhausting.  Self-care is neglected in favor of giving too much.  Compromise becomes an unfamiliar concept.  There isn’t much if any “agreeing to disagree”.  Relationships become tainted for both the feeders and the drained.  How are the vampires negatively effected by their own behavior?  They increase the chances of pushing others away when valuable relationships could be developed.  Other people may be afraid to be honest with them, thus emotional vampires may struggle to differentiate between what is true and false.  A sort of addiction is going on in order to “medicate” personal problems in a way that temporarily eases symptoms but gives no cure.  Satisfaction might seem unachievable for both parties.

Don’t be a martyr for a vampire.

The vampire feedbag is rather often going to be a person willing to let long-term manipulation take place.  Unaware empaths seem to be especially vulnerable to this form of abuse because of the deep compassion they feel for the wounded person.  They stick around enduring bad behavior because they ache with the abuser and want to help the energy vampire heal.   “I need to keep giving him what he wants and taking the blame because that helps him feel better.”  Self-sacrifice isn’t always heroic.  Sometimes it is just putting a bandage over an infected wound.  

How do I break the cycle of feeding?

This depends on if you are the energy-sucker or the drained.  If you realize you are an energy vampire (or becoming one), you need to take a good look at yourself.  You need give tough love to yourself.  Be honest with yourself that you need to cut out the bullshit, and compassionate enough with yourself that you allow your wounds to heal instead of tearing more holes into yourself.  Be mindful of when you are acting out and feeding off attention.  Find healthy ways to deal with your issues without negatively influencing others.

If you are being fed from, you need to set boundaries.  “I love you, but you are not allowed to drag me down with you.”  You must accept responsibility for your role in it if you chose to let the feeding take place.  You can’t place all the blame for your exhaustion on the other player if you chose to play the game.  You need to become aware of when you are being manipulated so that you can stand your ground.  You should try to stand your ground in a way that is not overly reactive.  Being too reactive “feeds the beast”.  Finally, come to terms with the fact that you are not solely responsible for the happiness of another.  You can influence the well-being of others, but they decide whether to work with you or work you.  Each adult individual needs to take some responsibility for their own well-being.  Don’t give until you have nothing left for yourself.

Blessed be, y’all.


P.S.  For those who wondered, I got some of my information about energy vampires from a YouTube channel called Zen Rose Garden.


Thoughts on Gratitude Guilting

I suspect some of those reading this have witnessed gratitude guilting.  For those who may not be sure what I am referring to, gratitude guilting is what I am calling the behavior when someone tries to win praise by guilting others for not seeming grateful enough.  This can take form as passive aggressive comments, whining, or direct shaming.  Some examples are (when directed at others):

“Why do I help anyone when I get so little thanks?”

“Liking something is not as good as commenting, have you know.”

“Why do I bother putting so much effort into my appearance when nobody bothers to tell me I look great?”

It is probably safe to give hard-working parents a free pass for doing this from time to time.  Cleaning up all that poop and dirty laundry while dealing with snarky little attitudes can be stressful.  Thus it is perfectly understandable to shout out “It sure would be nice to hear a thank you!” occasionally while in a state of highly-frustrated parental melt-down.

Let’s be honest though; many times we are helping ourselves while we help others.  It isn’t fair to gratitude guilt somebody when you are helping yourself too.  You don’t only wash the dishes for the sake of your housemates.  Chances are you don’t want a dirty kitchen or a roach infestation.  Also, you want some clean dishes for your next meal.

As a blogger, I know that my blog is for me even though I do hope to provide some insight and entertainment for others.  It feels great to read a comment in which somebody expresses appreciation for something I have written.  However, I know that comments gained by gratitude guilting would likely be insincere.  I don’t want to force gratitude on anybody.  That sucks the joy out of things.  Plus, I just don’t have that strong of a need for gratitude.  It’s nice, but it isn’t oxygen.  It makes me wonder about a person’s well-being if they are willing to shame somebody to get validation.

It seems particularly petty to me for a person to get nitpicky about the form of gratitude they receive.  People show appreciation in different ways.  A person showing appreciation differently than you do does not invalidate their expression.  Perhaps your co-worker brings you a cup of coffee as thanks for helping him catch up on paper work instead of saying the words “Thank you.”  Perhaps your husband brings you your favorite take-out because he is well aware the kids have been running you ragged.  (A  burrito can be every bit as romantic as a rose if you consider the reason for it.)  Perhaps your group members or social media followers give you ‘likes’ instead of commenting about how brilliant you are.  Appreciation shown is lovely in many forms.  You are missing out if you only recognize it being shown your way.

I suppose I have made my thoughts on the topic clear enough.  This was essentially a way for me to vent in a thought-out manner.  Feel free to let me know if you agree.  I would be interested to read examples that you have witnessed.

Heirloom and Approval


I frequently stay with my grandmother.  She gets lonely since my grandfather passed away almost four years ago, and we enjoy each other’s company.  I have went through her jewelry several times while there over the years for various reasons such as untangling chains and getting replacement earring backings.  The other day I was there and noticed a heart pendant in one of the jewelry drawers.  I don’t seem to recall seeing it previously, or at least I didn’t much note it.  I picked it up and examined it to see if it were costume jewelry or had a silver stamp on it.  I found I teeeeeny tiny engraving on the back of the bail but could not make out what it stated even with a magnifying glass.  As I was holding it and trying to figure out what the stamp was, I felt more and more attached to it.  I walked with it to my grandmother holding the pendant.  She wasn’t sure if it was silver, plated, or what have you.  However, she informed me it had been a gift to her mother-in-law (my great grandmother) from her and my grandfather.  My grandmother doesn’t wear it, but had held onto it since my great grandmother’s passing in circa 1989.  I don’t recall my grandfather’s mom because I was a wee babe when she passed.  My grandmother assumes I did meet her since she lived closed by, but didn’t seem to really recall me with her.

I found myself really wanting to keep this pendant.  I had this desire fixed in me, and slipped it onto the chain I was wearing to wear around my grandmother while she thought about whether or not I could have it.  She wasn’t sure she wanted to give it to me at first since she thought it might be unfair to other people in the family, but I figured they didn’t care too much since it had just been sitting in a drawer for three decades with presumably nobody asking about it.  She ended up giving it to me the next night.  That night/morning I ended up having a dream that I was walking along the road with my grandfather.  He had been unable to walk for some years before his passing.  It was so wonderful to see him walking around with ease and be in his company.  I wouldn’t necessarily say this felt/seemed like a spirit visit dream, but I do wonder if this was perhaps a way for my grandfather to show me he approved of me having his mother’s pendant.  I polished tarnish off of it today and put it on a chain.  I am wearing it around my neck, and I am thankful to have this piece of jewelry that was gifted with love to an ancesteral matriarch I didn’t get the chance to know.

Blessed be, y’all.